i wanted to wait, til i was able to fully compose myself and figure out what i really felt and thought about this tragedy. granted, it's only been 48+ hours, but i feel like i must say something.
during the columbine shootings: i was 13 years old and didn't realize the gravity of that event. i think i was simply paranoid. what if someone snaps at our school?? sure, i felt bad for the kids who lost their lives and their families, but unfortunately, i was more concerned about my own safety, and the people i cared about.
now that i'm a bit older and wiser, i cry for the dead and living victims, students and families. i grieve for them, and altho i know i will never fully understand...as a mother, i can sort of feel a bit of the pain that the parents/families of the college students who lost their lives may feel, and that little bit of pain is devistating to me.
the main thing that disturbs me, is that the gunman gave off so many red flags. teachers expressed their concern with authorities, within the school or otherwise, claiming his behavior and writing were disturbing. students either knew him as a quiet loner or a possible candidate for shooting up the school. and NOTHING was done??
he was able to purchase firearms, despite the fact that he was institutionalized in a mental health clinic? that DID NOT pop up on his record...why?? the gun control policies (or lack thereof) in this nation are FUCKED UP. something needs to be done.
i just hope we learn from our mistakes this time.
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